All credit to human ingenuity for being such an amazing thing. Just compare and contrast how we were a hundred years ago to how we are now. Your mind will be blown by how far we’ve advanced. We’ve gone from sending each other snail mail to being able to communicate with anyone in the world at a moment’s notice. We’ve gone from gathering around the local bard or minstrel to bingeing on Netflix. Not all inventions were made equal, however. Some make us scratch our heads and wonder what the hell the inventor was thinking, while some make us wonder why we never thought of the invention ourselves. Well, for this roundup—and for sheer entertainment’s sake—we’ve scoured the internet to find a bit of both. So, read on!
CUP HOLDER UMBRELLA
It’s not easy to carry a full cup of coffee while carrying other things. Indeed, we’ve all been through this balancing act at one point or another, and it doesn’t infrequently end in perfectly good coffee being spilled. Luckily—or, maybe, weirdly—some enterprising individual came up with the idea of incorporating a cup holder into an umbrella, making the task of holding both much easier. Now one’s other arm will be perfectly free to hold other things. It is, to some degree, a great idea—and one that we think should have been invented a long time ago.
ROTATING 360° SOCKETS
Messy and tangled wiring is the bane of any neat freak’s existence. Unfortunately, it is also unavoidable, given the innumerable gadgets and charging adapters we are asked to contend with on a daily basis. There are various concoctions in the market that are supposed to mitigate this annoyance that works to varying degrees of success, but none really make the problem disappear. Well, at least until now. Because this 360° rotating socket thingamajig seems to be primed to make the aforementioned problem a thing of the past. It’s called the Echogear Power Strip Surge Protector, and, if its online ratings are any indication, Amazon buyers seem to think it gets the job done without a hitch.
If you are, like me, an absolute novice in the kitchen. And if your knife skills are as so terrible as to be embarrassing, then this might be a product that will interest you. It is a really simple product—so simple, in fact, that we’re wondering why it took so long for someone to invent. It works quite well, too, and whoever came up with this thing deserves a lot of credit. Just stick it to an onion (or the vegetable of your choice) and let the comb-like teeth guide your knife into cutting it with perfect symmetry. Trust us, the finished product will look like it was trustily handled by the winner of Iron Chef.
LED HOURGLASS TRAFFIC LIGHT
Traffic lights are not just annoying, they’re also unpredictable. One often finds—or at least, one often feels—that the red light somehow disproportionately affects vehicles in one’s lane. If people somehow knew the duration of each light and could tell exactly when it will change, we predict that a lot of stress and burst blood vessels would be avoided. Well, there is a way to test this hypothesis, and it is with these traffic lights that have a countdown timer telling people precisely when the lights will change. It just might be the most worthwhile investment a city can make to reduce the concomitant stress of traffic.
For when those rolling pizza cutters just don’t… uh… cut it, these pizza scissors can be a great alternative! Those wheel cutters work well, to be sure, but not as well as these pizza scissors, which assure a perfect cut in one go. When one uses a wheel cutter, one often finds that one needs to do a second and third pass just to successfully cut through the dough. But not with these pizza scissors—yes siree bob!—they only require a single pass! How genius is this? Indeed, pizza scissors might just beat electricity as the best invention of the millennia!
SMART CONTACT LENSES FOR DIABETICS
This is truly a great invention. Not only will it correct the wearer’s vision, it will also be able to measure their blood sugar. No more needing to prick yourself to measure your sugar levels, because these contact lenses can do all that via your tears. It will look super-duper high-tech, too, because apparently the technology is such that one’s sugar levels will alter the color of the lenses, giving the wearer the ability to immediately assess their own health situation just by looking at the mirror. The maker of these lenses deserves a lot of credit for coming up with something that could, for all practical purposes, save many lives.
If you’re worried about scalding yourself with hot water, or have the same reservations when giving your baby a bath, then this faucet thermometer, which will measure the temperature of the water and give you an instant readout, might be a product that will interest you. You could, of course, just dip your hand in the water and feel if it’s the right temperature, but where’s the fun in that? It’ll be orders of magnitude more fun if you have a bunch of numbers that tell you what the exact temperature degree is, right? Right!? Actually, we’re not so sure, but it definitely looks like a cool addition to any bathroom.
How many times have you deigned to highlight a passage in a book only to find that you’ve highlighted was the wrong one? None? Well, trust us, it could happen. In fact we don’t remember that it ever happened to us but we’re sure that it must have happened at one point or another. And that inconsequential and almost microscopic risk is exactly what this product was invented to avoid. Now you’ll never have to worry about mistakenly highlighting the wrong passage ever again because the transparency of the highlighter’s tip will assure that you will always see whatever it is you are highlighting. It’s not really a mind-blowing invention, but it can be useful to some degree.
ELECTRICAL CABLE MANAGEMENT BOX
What can be more unsightly than a bunch of tangled up electrical cords? Actually, a lot of things. But that doesn’t make messy and unconcealed electrical cords any less painful to the eyes! One wishes that they would just go away! Of course they are inanimate objects that can’t do that, so until someone comes up with an invention that can make them do, we’ll just have to live with this contraption, which is likely the second-best option. Now you won’t need to have all those cords messing up your flooring, because they can be neatly put to one side, inside the electrical cable management box.
PLANTAR FASCIITIS SOCKS
Are your feet killing you? Figuratively speaking, of course. Because if they are, then this might be the product for you! It even advertises itself as being FDA recommended and feet specialist-approved, which necessarily gives us some level of assurance that they will work to keep the constant pain in your feet at bay. Indeed, these socks—which have been aptly called “Treat my Feet Compression Socks”—are said to have been engineered precisely to keep one’s ankle feeling perfectly compressed. Sure, the design is, to some degree, iffy, but if it works it works, right? These socks may just make foot pain a thing of the past, so they’re definitely worth a try!